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06: When to Stop Caring


06: When to Stop Caring

Christopher Bartley


We antiheroes have polarized emotions and characteristics. We didn't care what people thought while we were badasses doing our pre-shame game or dirt. We might've ruined valuable relationships, damaged others' self-esteem or stolen money and didn't care that much to change our destructive patterns. But now, post-shame, we're on the other extreme of caring way too much about what others think of us, which is just as damaging—if not worse—than not caring at all. What to do?

First, understand that now is the time to put other people's thoughts about you on hold. Let go of those opinions of others. Transcend it. You've got enough to last you for the next two years. How to do that? Intentionally position yourself in a place (location or locution-wise) that will make people form an opinion about you that you cannot control. Examples are in this wrave. The "Starbucks" one is adapted from's Leo Gura (video here).